Bits of Funnies

Warning: this post is just sillyness and includes, KungFu, betel nut homeless, tattoos, muscles, pigeons, MOMO, urologists and Chinese Dorm boys.

First up: Our daughter came complete with some Kung Fu. We were at the hotel in Taiwan and I said, Hi ya (as in hello) and our dear little Milana comes running with a full side kick screaming High YAH! She still does. I know it's stereotypical but it is comical.

Cell phone ringtones in Taiwan: I was wandering around when I noticed no one there had downloaded songs for their cell phones. The silent library of a packed MRT was filled with stock cell phone rings. I seem to be the only one in America with a stock ring and I often get made fun of... there, I was one of the majority.

Betel Nut Homeless People: Here we had just picked up Milana and stepped off the highspeed rail. We made our way to the subway and as we were trying to find the correct line, we stepped on the wrong elevator. It was one with double doors and I accidentally was facing the wrong door. Exhausted from the day, I was mentally slow and when the back door opened, my husband stepped out with the luggage and I turned around to see the door close and a glimpse of my husband outside who knows where, looking slightly frightened.

Now I'm panicking. Alone on an elevator, he has the money, the passports, the cell phones, MRT passes and I have Milana and no idea where he is. As soon as the doors landed wherever they may (probably looked crazy as I punched buttons frantically trying to remember which floor Donnie was on), I stayed put and said a prayer.

Meanwhile, hubby is outside and turns around to a hoard of homeless people who look like they have bloody teeth (betelnuts) and are so excited to see him. They come running over yelling in Chinese and rubbing their bodies all over. Donnie is a little concerned at this moment as they are lifting their shirts and rubbing their butts, seemingly asking Donnie to take off this clothes. They thought because of his tattoos that he was like the yakuza and tattooed from head to tail. Didn't help that he has some Japanese style tattoos. I was laughing my head off when he told me about the red-teethed homeless man rubbing his butt all jumping up and down twitching and yelling Chinese at him. I wish I could have seen this. As soon as the door opened and he saw us, he jumped on; we waved at probably 30 Chinese men whom I had no idea why they were so happy and Donnie's best friends. Happiest homeless people on the planet.

Speaking of tattoos, we covered them when we went to SLC as not to surprise the guests. Our in country coordinator saw them on the train and was quite surprised. Later, when the guests had left SLC, our coordinator and another social worker were talking about Donnie's tats and wanted to see them. He didn't know if it was rude to change in front of them so he turned his back to the corner. Giggling ensued from the two women and it made me laugh too. I missed the comments and gestures the women were making about his muscles, but Donnie didn't. One was making squishy handmotions as if to squeeze his arms, making woof woof noises of some kind, and smiling coyly, while the other was giggling and trying to shish her, covering her mouth and elbowing her. It was so funny.

Pigeons: In America, they are a nuisance. Taipei zoo... people chasing them trying to feed them and pet them. Grown men and children alike, chasing them down as I kinda grossed out. I wanted to yell, don't touch those dirty things. Nothing at all grossed me out in Taiwan... just that. There aren't many animals in the city so it must be a treat to see the birds. I just don't like pigeons even though they clean up the yuck.

Soy Sauce: My husband's co-worker asks what Milana's Chinese name is, when he says Hsiu-Yu, he says, "Your daughter's name is soy sauce?!" He's Hawaiian and proceeds to tell him that the way Hsiu-Yu is pronounced (show you) is soy sauce in Hawaii. I always knew she was full of flavor!

We went to the Urologist for Milana. While waiting in the room, I see the door slowly crack open and the doctor peeks his head in almost scared. Next he looks confused and starts speaking Chinese to me. I start laughing and say, I don't know Mandarin as he looks so relieved. He then starts speaking to Milana in Mandarin and I noticed her very confused look on her face. I tell him she speaks mostly Taiwanese and he goes, Aw man, I only know about 4 words in Taiwanese. He is very giddy and excited to see Milana and asks so many questions about her. He asks where my husband works, if he speaks Chinese, etc. and then says, so she is part Chinese and I say, "No she is full Chinese." Now the Doc's poor jaw drops open wide as he is either thinking, "This lady had tons of plastic surgery because she doesn't look Chinese" or "This lady is crazy." So I help out and say adopted. Ohh. He tells me he was so confused with her profile that said from Taiwan but the last name is so not Chinese. Now he's even more excited. He tells me that he is second generation Chinese and doesn't know Mandarin, that he is learning it from his son and that his son's tutor lives on his side of town and basically invites me to his son's tutor lessons. I love this doctor. He is so cool! He thinks it's so cool that we accidentally found him as I had no idea he was Chinese when we scheduled Milana's appt. Next the nurse comes in and he takes off, only to come back every couple minutes to tell me more things and ask more questions. He told me to check out Two Lions on youtube... this is what happened when I typed that in.

Enjoy some funny men that my husband and I found looking for Mandarin to teach our family. =0)


MOMO school... if you were wondering what your children watch in Taiwan, it's MOMO school. Milana knows all the songs and they also teach some English. Milana as best she can, has told us all about it. It's very cute... I'll put a youtube vid on this post.