Tuesday, May 31, 2011

The Dreaded White Smear!

Disclosing the child's identity would not be prudent and I want to avoid mocking the child...just the behavior. haha

While waiting for one child to join the others for our nightly story time, I heard incredible screams reverberating through my house, "MOM!!! Hurry, come quick! It's an EMERGENCY!" I feared the worst aka "Is there poop all over?" Rapidly I was met with "NOOOO MOM IT'S WORSE!" Oh you know I bolted up those stairs.

As I rounded the corner I came face to bum with a child standing on the bathroom sink, cupping their hands around their calves. White melted goo had run the length of, not only this child's legs, but their entire body . I glance over and see a new tube of Desitin three-quarters of the way empty. The rest... was on... the child.

The smeary mess covered their hands, arms, chin, legs, bum, toes, and stomach. My initial reaction: how awesomely hilarious!! Next I remembered how hard it was to clean off, how hard it is for me to remember to buy that stuff when it runs low, and a bit of peeved moodiness that the children would now be late for bedtime due to scrubbing a kid for 15 to 20 minutes.

"Why did you do this??!!??" "Uh mom, because my butt was really itchy." I guess really itchy has to be answered back in style.

Pulled the kid down, handed it a bar of soap and said, "Get to scrubbing." That was pure delight on my part watching the nature of life teach the lesson for me... Desitin doesn't come off easy!! haha

The slop proceeded to turn into a greasy concoction that painted my tub, faucet, and increasingly white child. I jumped in and started to help this poor little wild thing (who's frustration was mounting). After I deemed the cleaning sufficient (or my tiredness said who cares), we dried the little desitin hound and lotioned the child's now drier-than-ash body. On the plus side, we now both smell baby-butt fresh!


Steve n Coco said...

Oh my gosh! You write the best posts. Seriously, laughing out loud by myself!! I just KNEW by the title of this post that it had something to do with diaper rash cream. That is too funny-- and such a HUGE mess!

lorabelle said...

Laughing out loud and getting a big kick out of this! I'm thinking it might be time to do away with the Desitin and look for something a little less messy! :) There is way better stuff out there now!
I always wish I had taken pictures during times like these. Did you happen to get one?
Just picturing this in my head will make me smile all afternoon. Thanks for sharing the fun times!

Unknown said...

Oh! I feel your pain! Love your blog entries... You inspire me! Love ya!

Tisra said...

Desitin never worked for my kids AND its hard to clean off... did the devil himself make the stuff?!

I love natural consequences, though!

You're such a good mommy! :-)

The Family K. said...

...and he was only trying to de-itch his derriere. Poor guy. Poor mom.

John Smith said...

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